Worry, fear, anxiety. These mental and emotional patterns will always be a part of all our lives as long as we are human! But how much of it really needs to be a part of our daily experience? I honestly believe it’s possible to only expend a tiny percentage of our mental and emotional energy on these negative emotions. But how?
Is this your thought life at times, too?
I’m sure you can relate to a few of these general ideas: I have so much going through my head ALL the time, how is his/her health? How is my health? How is that going to work out? Did I make the right decision? What’s going to happen? And what about all the worrying we do about our parents or our kids? And then, after I have these thought questions looping in my head, I run through all these crazy scenarios with the “what ifs.” UGH…This is exhausting! This is where much of my stress begins. So, if I could stop my head from traveling forward in time to make believe situations that almost NEVER happen the way I imagine it, my life would be less stressful. If I could stop my head from traveling in the past thinking about how a different choice might have put me in a different place now, my life would be less stressful.
Moment of realization.
I was driving to Verizon the other day and I caught myself doing the above-mentioned scenario but the questions running through my head were about decisions I’m making with the business. I had so many thoughts and scenarios playing out in my head, but then when some of the what-if scenarios got a little crazy and I began gripping the steering wheel tight and driving a little faster than I usually do, I realized that I was creating made-up situations in my head as if my thoughts were reality. The questions had become more than just thoughts. These questions turned into physical reactions, like my heart beating faster, my hands gripping the steering wheel, and my foot pressing the gas pedal harder. Meanwhile, the thoughts were not obstacles, they were just made up thoughts that were not connected to actual events. One thought turned into a new thought and a deeper rabbit hole I traveled down. Before I knew it, I felt defeated and anxious about myself as a business owner and the potential of where my business was going!
I parked the Jeep and sat there for a minute. My first thought came as I realized my attitude was dramatically different from when I left the office. I was having a great day until I started driving and thinking. OMG! I literally just talked myself into a bad mood.
So, the first thing I did was say out loud, “what is truth?” The truth was that I imagined all those bad scenarios and I just stressed myself out. None of what I was thinking was happening and to be honest, most of what I was thinking wasn’t even realistic. I mentally trashed all the bad thoughts I had and got myself back to reality by remembering how my day was going so far, how I have the power to control my actions and attitude, and there is no sense in worrying anyway.
Another source of fear, worry, and anxiety
One of the biggest hang-ups I deal with is when my brain reminds me of how I am not where I want to be in life, yet. When this is going on, I see myself, or on-going habits as obstacles. Seeing myself as an obstacle is the biggest lie going! I am my biggest asset, but yet I put myself down as if I haven’t accomplished anything.
This AHA moment started coming together for me about 2 days before driving to Verizon. I usually look into the mirror in the morning and pick out my flaws. My eyes are puffy, or my skin isn’t smooth, or I have wrinkles, I have been procrastinating, I’m not sticking to my healthy routines. This morning I looked into the mirror and I really liked what I saw! I am adorable! I am pretty. I am funny. I am accomplished. Wow, that was a great feeling. I needed to write that down. Because within a few hours, I could think about something that isn’t finished yet and go right back into the “I am not worthy or accomplished” mindset. This is crazy. I am going to get a hold of this! And it won’t be tomorrow, it will be today.
Your intuition will serve you well if you allow it.
It’s very easy to allow your thoughts to get carried away and create obstacles and attitudes that don’t exist. I’m not saying don’t strategize or think about possible what-ifs to be prepared, but no more than a minute a or two. Really. If I allow my emotions to overwhelm me, I don’t think of solutions or what is realistic. Negative emotions cloud my judgment and being emotional blocks my ability to hear and connect to my intuition.
And here is Truth: when we stop focusing on “the how” and focus on the present, the Universe unravels “the how” as needed!
Stay in your happy moment.
This can be a simple process. Try not to make it complicated. Keep a note on your phone and every night jot down the date, something you are thankful for, and something you finished, accomplished or did nice for someone else. I call those your “wins.” Go back and read these regularly. Look at yourself and your accomplishments from the perspective of a professional life coach, what would they say?
Next, start your day out with setting your intentions, put out verbal energy for what you want to accomplish for you. Look at your gratitude list and your list of “wins.” Let your daily walk begin with affirmations confirming your strength and beauty. This is Truth. This is what you always go back to.
And last, stand in your power. Know that you are in control of your mind, your thoughts, and your actions. Know that everything which comes into your life is orchestrated to help evolve your soul into a more loving being. You are never a victim. You are a peaceful warrior with a strong mind and heart and are determined to see your life from a new perspective!
Wishing you wellness,
Nan
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